Hello summertime 2017

Hello, my bucket list friends! I hope all of you are enjoying the summer time! Summer is my favorite time of year it is full of sunshine and adventure but I do have to say that this summer is a bit of a challenge for me. Since I’m going through a big career change, I’m in school three days a week and working part time and because of this I’m not doing any big vacations this year. I’m so sad that I’m not going to Disneyland this year or spending a week exploring a wonderful city. With money and time both tight this year this is going to be a very different summer then what I’m used to but even though things are hard right now I’ve still been enjoying my summer as best as I can. I went to an amazing concert, it was a Joan Jett and Boston concert. I also crossed number 55 off my list, went to my cousin’s beautiful wedding , did some shopping and I have also enjoyed some wonderful food . I have a few more fun things planed and I can’t wait to tell you about then when they happen .

 

 

#55 ride on the back of a motorcycle

Hello my bucket list friends ! I’m very excited to say that I’ve crossed off my second bucket list item for 2017 and my first bucket list item for summertime of 2017 . It was a very exciting  item to cross off and I can’t wait to tell you all about it so let’s get going !

 

#55 ride on the back of motorcycle

First things first I want to give a big thank you to my friend Nick for helping me cross this item off ! I was very nervous to cross this item off but also very excited. I borrowed a jacket, helmet and gloves form my neighbor  I had everything I needed to cross this item off my list .Everything was all very new to me but I ended up having a great time . Nick is a wonderful driver and he made the rode both safe and fun . I was nervous going on the highway at first but on the way back I felt so free! The nerves were gone and all I felt was happiness and freedom. It was truly a perfect day complete with ice cream. I can’t wait to go on another ride again .  This is one item that I recommend putting on your list .

Rock on – Christina Epperly

My OCD story

My OCD story

 

Hello, my bucket list friends! In my last post, I talked about how I was going to be writing some more

personal bog posts this month. The topic of mental health is something that I believe does not get the

attention that it needs. I’ve wanted to share my personal story about my struggle with mental health for

quite some time but I have been holding back but there is no day like today so here goes nothing.

When I look back on my childhood I can see that I have had OCD pretty much my whole life but I didn’t

know it back then, nobody did. OCD was not something that was well known back when I was growing

up in the 90’s and 00’s so unfortunately no one was able to diagnose me when I was a child. Even

though I did not have a diagnosis there was not questioning that I had something going on with me. I

struggled in school, I was held back in kindergarten, I did not want to stay in my seat during class I

wanted to pace in the back of the classroom eventually I was told that I had ADHD.  Throughout my

childhood I was almost always in trouble for something and I had a hard time keeping friends. I was

always saying or doing things that were mean or rude, things that I knew I shouldn’t have been doing.

Everything from hiding other kids toys to pushing smaller kids when I got angry to saying things just to

get others angry but I felt like I had to, that bad things would happen if I did not obey.  I did not know at

the time that I was having obsessive thoughts. My young mind did not know how to verbalize what was

going on so I would say that I was hearing voices.  As you can imagine this created a problem in itself.

My parents took me to doctors and therapists but because I was not saying the right things no one was

able to properly diagnose me with OCD. I went to a small private elementary school and it didn’t take

long for me to get branded as a mean kid and a trouble maker. I remember when a child at school had a

birthday party and the whole school got invited except for me and another student. I’m not saying that I

didn’t deserve it because I did. The brand that was placed upon me was well earned. The truth was I was

not the only victim of my OCD others around me suffered as well. The intrusive thoughts that I acted

upon hurt others as well. My OCD hurt everyone from my classmates, my teachers, my family, and

myself.  After 4th grade my mom decide to homeschool me. Those were some good years! I was a

member of two homeschool groups so I spent plenty of time with other kids, I

went on lots of field trips and enjoyed other fun activities even though I still struggled with my OCD

without knowing that I had it yet. One of the biggest struggles that I remember having was probably

around my tween and early teen years. I was raised in a Christian home and I loved going to church and

doing my best to live my life for God. I loved being a Christian but all of a sudden, I started having

thoughts that God did not exist I was in a constant battle in these thoughts and they created havoc in

my life. I little did I know I was experiencing what is known as scrupulosity which is a part of OCD.

overall, I was in a pretty good place during those years.  I was put on medication

somewhere in my tween or early teen years but it didn’t seem to help. When I reached the end of my

middle school years it was decided that public school was the best place for me so I could get a public

school diploma and my mom would go back to work.  After I took some tests it was determined that I

qualified for special Ed services. I spent the last month of my 8th grade year going to public middle school

for half days to get me used to the public-school environment. I wasn’t a fan of public school there were

a lot of behavior problems in the special ED program and by this time in my life I had mellowed out a lot.

I listened to teachers and for the most part I made following the rules a priority. The other kids offended

me with their bad language and their disrespectful attitudes. I had done a complete 180 from my

elementary school years. I went from being a trouble maker to being pretty much a model student.

After I finished my one month of public school I received my middle school diploma. Then it was just a

few short months before the long haul of high school began.

When I started high school I pretty much didn’t have any friends the one friend that I had since I was

four years old told me we were no longer friends and that was that. My sister was in 12th grade at the

same school but we didn’t spend time together while we were at school.  I was friendless and in for a

huge culture shock. The safe and comfortable world of homeschool was no more for me now I was in

the public high school world of sex, drugs and disobedience. I’m pretty such it was the 2nd day of high

school When a group adopted me, the day before I had been invited to eat lunch with nice group of girls

and they were very welcoming but the 2nd day during lunch I didn’t know what to do so I sat down by a

tree and ate my lunch. There was a group right next to the tree and they invited me to sit with them and

I did for all four years of high school I sat by that tree. Just like middle school, High school was no

different it was a rough place. With my OCD still invisible and ridding on my back I did the best I could to

survive high school. Even though I was living in an R rated movie every day in a place filled curse words

being said every other word, drugs in plain sight and vodka in water bottles. By the time I reached 12th

grade I was doing overall pretty good I still hated public school but I had some good friends by my side I

was a member of the mock trial team and I enjoyed my photography and art classes but graduation day

could not come fast enough for me . After a wonderful summer, I started community college with the

goal of being a preschool teacher. It was during those years When I discovered that I did in fact have

OCD. I knew I had something but I was not sure what since I was told but a doctor that I didn’t have OCD

just OCD tendencies and I knew whatever it was that I had was not just ADHD. I sat down at the

computer and looked at the Wikipedia pages for different conidiations. I first looked at the pages for Bi

polar disorder and schizophrenia When I read those pages I saw that I had some of the same symptoms

but for the most part I couldn’t really relate to what was being described. Then I read the page for OCD

and it was as if my whole life was written on that page. Everything from my disturbing thoughts to my

doubt to my behavior as a child now made sense. Not long after this I was able to get on medication that

was right for me and also just being more aware of what was going on with me made a world of

difference. There is no cure for OCD so I will always have to deal with it and I still have my struggles

today and I will wright about that is another blog post but I’m very proud of myself for everything I have

accomplished in life even with OCD and I can’t wait to see what things I will accomplish in the years to come.

Rock on – christina Epperly

May comfort zone buster conclusion and June’s comfort zone buster

May comfort zone buster conclusion and June’s comfort zone buster

Hello, my bucket list friends and happy June! I hope you are all having a wonderful start to summer.  For my May comfort zone buster, I decide to take time for myself by expressing my creativity. I’m happy to say I did a pretty good job with this. I finished quite a few pages in my wreck this journal, uploaded some YouTube videos and published some more poems on writer’s café. It made me happy to make progress on my wreck this journal

since finishing it is a bucket list item. It is very important to remember to take time for yourself and work on something you love

 

 

June 2017 comfort zone buster

For this month’s comfort zone buster, I decided to start making more personal blogs posts and YouTube videos. Of course, I’m still going to be posting about my bucket list and I will still be making my bucket list talk videos on YouTube but I will also be discussing my struggle with OCD and mental health in general. I consider myself to be an open book and this is something that I have been wanting to share on my blog for a while. Even though I am a very open and honest person sharing something that is so deep and personal can be nerve racking but I believe that mental health is something that needs to be talked about as much as possible. I hope to have my first post about my OCD up in a week or so. I look forward writing the posts and making the videos for you guys.  Rock on -Christina Epperly

March / April comfort zone buster update and my May comfort zone buster

hello my bucket list friends ! As most of you know my news years’ goal was to challenge myself with a new comfort zone buster each month. For March and April my comfort zone buster was to stop saying sorry as much as I usually did. I’m glad I choose this comfort zone buster. I learned to choose other words or to just say ok instead of defaulting to sorry. I’m now more aware of the way I interact with people . This comfort zone buster helped me to learn that it was ok if I didn’t know something or if I didn’t get something right the first time . I’m still not a %100 perfect when it comes to saying sorry for things that are not my fault but I’m well on my way to breaking this bad habit.

 

May 2017 comfort zone buster

For this month’s comfort zone buster, I’m going to challenge myself to do something creative at least once a week. Now, being creative is not out of my comfort zone but finding time to be creative with my extremely busy life is. Some bucket list items I have been working on will be Included in this month’s comfort zone buster. I’m excited to spend the month being creative as can be . it is important to remember to make time for yourself and this comfort zone buster will help me do that.

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Walt Disney Family museum

Hello, my bucket list friends! This past weekend I went on a fun day trip to the Walt Disney family museum in San Francisco. It was just the break I needed from work and school. I have been very busy this year and I was so blessed to have a weekend where I didn’t have to go to work or school it was the perfect opportunity for a day trip to the Walt Disney Family Museum.  After about an hour drive my mom and I arrived at the museum. Parking was easy to find and pay for, we parked in the lot right behind the museum. When we got inside the museum, we bought our tickets and walked around the lobby area looking at all the awards that Walt Disney had received. There were many cases of awards. After looking around the lobby area, we went to the gift shop and I got some cool souvenirs. Then it was time to enter the main area of the museum. The first room was all about Walt’s early life as we went through each of the rooms a new time in Walt’s life was showcased. I got more and more amazed with everything there was to see in each room. The originals drawings were wonderful it was so much fun to see early Mickey Mouse merchandise. The museum had Walt’s family pictures as well and items from the first Disney movies and cartoons. My favorite room was the Disneyland room, there was a model of Disneyland park it was breath taking! I hope that I get to go back to the museum some day because there is so much to see. After walking through the museum, we ate lunch at the café in the museum I really enjoyed the food. Overall I highly recommend this museum to any Disney fan. It was a perfect day to spend my day off from school.

Rock on – Christina Epperly

#215 get some Lisa Frank clothes

Hello, my bucket list friends! I’m very excited to tell all of you that I crossed off my first bucket list item of 2017. I can’t wait to tell you all about it so let’s get going.

 

Recently I add ten items to my bucket list and getting Lisa Frank clothes was one of them. I was born in 1990 so needless to say Lisa frank was a big part of my childhood but even as an adult I love Lisa Frank .When I saw that Rage On had Lisa frank clothes I really wanted to get some, I was low on money  I added it to my bucket list so I wouldn’t forget about it. Soon after I added number 215 to the list I started getting more hours at work and I could afford to get some of those colorful Lisa Frank clothes. I got two shirts and I love them both! They are so beautiful and colorful . I’m glad I crossed another item off my list and I can’t wait to cross off more list items.